Poetry by Edward ian Armchair

Fat Gut, Bald Head, Smart, Grey Suit

Fat gut, bald head, smart grey suit - very cute.
Hamlets Wine Bar You look so smart in your executive clothes.
Manicured nails and turned up nose.
Large knotted tie, loud striped shirt.
The Daz blue whiteness hides the daily dirt.

Fat gut, bald head, smart grey suit.
You feel so well with your private medical care.
That special shampoo hides your greying hair.
Your secretary's excited by your executive cock.
As you strip her naked in your sober grey socks.

Fat gut, bald head, smart grey suit.
Your parents always said you'd always go far.
So proud of your executive company car.
Keeping fit and active - squash, badminton, tennis.
All with nice names - Roger, Nigel and Dennis.

Fat gut, bald head, smart grey suit.
At dinner time you drink real ale, it opens up your bowels.
Chatting up the barmaid as you clearly pronounce your vowels.
Eating quiche Lorraine on a Friday afternoon.
You can tell you're from a different class the way you hold your spoon.

Fat gut, bald head, smart grey suit - very cute.

Edward says...

Hamlets Wine Bar Every lunchtime, we used to go to a place called Hamlets Wine Bar in Tamworth, England. This establishment was years ahead of the rest of the pub trade. This was the late 1970s-early 1980s, pubs were pubs, all beer, smoke, sweaty bum cracks and if you were lucky a packet of pork scratchings. Hamlets, was, oh! so different, thanks to the wonderful Brian and Val who ran it. The difference was, it served wine, no one drank wine in the 70s and 80s in Tamworth, real ale, nowhere else had even heard of real ale, but most importantly they served food. Every type of food you could imagine, including, believe it or not, foreign cuisine, yes FOREIGN CUISINE!! Curry, quiche, Parmesan cheese, mountains of salad, hard-boiled eggs, rice. Sadly, being unemployed and destitute we couldn't afford any of this delightful food, just a 5p pint of orange squash each. But of course it appealed to the lunchtime business crowd, swanning in, with their three-piece suits and secretaries. Filling their fat, wealthy faces with plate after plate of delicious food. We were so jealous!!! Hence, I give you: "Fat Gut, Bald Head, Smart Grey Suit - very cute!. Edward
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